17 December 2020
Knowing my son – is to know that he would much rather sit with you and talk about his interests, your interests, tantalising you with a few “Did you know facts” and lately, playing board games – especially Monopoly.
If he had to choose between: (1) a new toy or (2) quality time and attention, he would choose the latter most of the time.
Being a self-employed single mom, certainly means a lot of juggling to execute all responsibilities, but it was quality time with him – that I feel I have failed him.
I will always resent myself for that.
In the beginning of the first lockdown in 2020 – I have enjoyed and appreciated the time just to sit down and be with him. The rat race - came to a halt due to the pandemic.
It was the two of us - against the world – just spending quality time together.
Bailey made us a family of three and contributed to our new adventure.
Home-schooling gave me a new perspective on life and I was amazed to realize what type of “teacher” I was and what type of learner he is.
As weeks became months, the longing to go back to school, to be with his friends and to participate in all his activities especially rugby and hockey, became unbearable.
Since the first lockdown, he was only back in school for a total of 3 weeks in 2020, before he was finally diagnosed with this terrible cancer.
Recently, due to Covid-19, cancer and the fact that going back to school is being postponed indefinitely, his morale started to dip drastically.
One day in hospital, I showed him photos to remind him of all our adventures, memories and his accomplishments he had up until now.
Despite everything we had been through and what lies ahead of us, I am trying to motivate him spiritually & factually, that there is still a lot to be conquered”.
God has a purpose for our lives and He is walking with us every step of the way.
I made a point of making affirmations part of our daily routine.
I often tell him, he is:
Brave
Beautiful
A Problem solver
A Kind hearted soul
I am proud of him
He is important
Never give up
Always give a little more - expect a little less
It is OK to make mistakes – learn from them, etc.
He will survive this
But most importantly, he must never forget how much he is LOVED.
One day, after the last affirmation – he looked at me and said:
“Mommy, you just have to say it – cause you are my Mom!”
(big tears)
My heart almost stopped. I could see how he could feel that way. From his point of view, especially after being isolated for so long.
Another tangible way to show him, how much he is loved, was to reminded him what Philip Snyman told him…
“The Philip Snyman story”…
My son’s love for rugby was first introduced by R Skills and Development in 2016.
In 2018, at one of the regional rugby day events, my son was beyond excited the entire day, especially seeing all of “the friends” to play with. The organisers gave the little boys a motivational talk before they played their games. The announcer demonstrated (holding up two rugby balls), in his hands. One inflated ball, the other a deflated ball.
He explained that life with Jesus is like an inflated rugby ball. When you kick the inflated ball, it will travel far.
Life without Jesus is like a deflated ball – not going to get very far…
Just before the excited little ones went off to play rugby, the announcer asked if someone wanted to pray and my little human offered without hesitation:
Translation:
Announcer asked him: “are you going to pray for us?”
My son: Nodded, yes.
Announcer: “Can we please all close our eyes?”
My son: “Thank you Jesus for the wonderful day, that we can play rugby, thank you for all the friends to play with, and thank you that we have mothers and grandmothers” Amen.
The last ten minutes of these games are played with all the dads of the players.
As per the previous times, I took of my shoes and went with him on the field.
But that day, after the game, my son just burst out into tears.
(He was upset, as he was convinced that he was the only boy without a father)
Whilst I was trying to comfort him, Philip Snyman, an outstanding kind and respectful man, took sincere interest in the commotion.
Philip walked toward us and just sat down next to my son on the grass.
Philip have never met us, nor knew about the situation or our past.
He started to have a deep conversation with my son -
I caught the last part on video:
Philip Snyman: “I was very young, when my Dad had deserted us – therefore I had to grow up without a father. At a very young age, I decided to grow up to be the best man and a father I can be . I will strive to make the best possible of my life. So every day – I reminded myself of my goal in life: to be the best son for my mother, best for my family and the best friend, to my friends. I also decided to follow Jesus and when He is for me, nobody can be against me. That is exactly what you are going to do – don’t you agree. You are a strong iron man. Jesus loves you very much. You will be a grown man one day and you will be the best father for your children that a man can be. Give me a high 5 and smile with me for a photograph.”
Since that day – a hero was born. Someone that my son could look up to: Always trying to do better, never to give up and make a difference in someone else's life.
"Philip Snyman, a three-time World Rugby Sevens Series champion ended his international career in 2019 (due to a career-ending back injury), for the Blitzboks as South Africa’s most successful captain, leading his country to two World Series crowns and a bronze medal at the Rugby World Cup Sevens in 2018. He debuted for the Blitzboks in 2008 and was part of the historic squad who won their first World Series title that season, also was an Olympic Games bronze medallist in 2016. He was the only Blitzbok to play at three RWC7s tournaments."
I contacted RSD in the beginning of December 2020 and reached out to RSD founder and owner, Phillip van Coller, whom immediately suggested to arrange a meeting with Philip Snyman. Philip Snyman said he remembered that day he met my son in 2018, as if it was yesterday.
Kindly click on photos for slideshow
I want to sincerely thank Philip Snyman and Phillip van Coller for taking time out of their busy schedules to inspire my son.
Thank you for making him feel so loved and special. His excitement, hope and thoughts focused on living life to the fullest.
His amazing smile was lit up.
Thank you for all the rugby memorabilia and making him focus on his dreams again.
Thank you for the owner of Gino’s Pizza, Stellenbosch.
My gratitude is endless.
No matter where you are, or what you going through - remember you are loved and you are never alone - as Jesus is always with you.
He walks in front of you – to lead you through difficult times
He walks beside you – always there when you need a friend
He walks behind you – to catch you when you fall.
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